We all have things we want to achieve in life. When it comes to health it could be weight loss, gaining muscle, losing body fat or just improving fitness and wellbeing. There is so much emphasis out there on goal setting to attain success, it’s the way I was taught in school and in the workplace. We all love the idea of a big goal igniting a new found level of motivation in us, jotting down new years resolutions or joining a gym as the guarantee that those life changing things will now happen.
The problem is that thinking about something won’t make things happen. No one gets to a goal without looking at the process of how to get there. For changes to occur in life you must first look within. This can be the hard part. Change requires mental adjustments that allow you to be open to addressing certain areas of your lifestyle. When a goal seems too large or too difficult it can be easy to blame work, family or other circumstances in your life that can make things more difficult, but not impossible.
Setting certain goals can have a negative impact by creating a false perception of “when I reach my goal, then i’ll be good enough.” Researches from four of the top business schools have found “in many cases goals do more harm than good.” This can place too much attention on the wrong things and puts you in a perpetual state of feeling like a continuos failure until you reach the goal. When a person feels they are failing at something it is a de-motivator, this can cause you to throw all those good intentions out the window. According to Ray Williams “The brain is wired to seek rewards and avoid pain or discomfort, including fear.”
So what to do instead? Take the focus away from larger goals and foster an interest in building a lifestyle structure that will have you moving towards your desired image of health, wellness and weight loss. Stop thinking about the symptoms or outcomes of the problem and focus on the process, or as Scott Adam's puts it, the system and not the goal. It sounds so simple right?
And in some ways, it is.
Move away from those size goals, restrictive diet goals or trying the latest weight loss trend and instead start adding your own actionable systems to build a healthy lifestyle into your daily, weekly and monthly routine. As stated by Adams who is not referring directly to weight loss yet it rings so perfectly true “Beware of advice about successful people and their methods. For starters, no two situations are alike”. Just because your buddy next door lost 30 pounds on a Paleo diet or your other friend swears by training for a marathon to get results does not mean this is the path for you.
Find Your System
Recognize your weaknesses:
Is there a time of day you find you feel is the hardest to make good food choices? Then fill that time with something else. Schedule a meeting with a colleague, go for a walk, make a herbal tea or catch up on a call or email with friends or family.
Play up to your strengths:
What do you enjoy that will improve your health and wellbeing? Maybe it’s walking or practicing yoga. Whatever it is you enjoy doing find the time to fit it in. Go for a walk at lunchtime or meet a friend for a walk instead of a drink. If you feel you don't have time to exercise in a studio then find some classes online you can do in 20 minutes before work.
Break it down:
Making big dietary changes all at once usually results in a period of dedication which slowly (or quickly) unravels as resolve dwindles . You need to address your behavior patterns which directly relates to the systems in your life. Start small, such as adding vegetables to 2 meals a day, eating a high protein breakfast or replacing unhealthier snacks with fruit or nuts. Over time the more healthy and nutritious foods you are consuming will leave less room and desire for junk.
Build in small achievements:
Did you make it to the gym 3 days this week like you scheduled? Or did you eat vegetables and lean protein for dinner Monday, Wednesday and Thursday? Whatever systems you are successful with each week should be recognized. It could be going to see a movie or having a massage. Celebrate the small wins as they are what will get you there.
Try new things:
Get out and try a bunch of different activities. Get out of your comfort zone. Hiking, group classes, swimming, tennis, Pilates, social sports on the weekends, running clubs. There is bound to be something that motivates you. Keep things from getting stale by mixing it up.
Schedule activities:
Find some activities and book them in. Don't wait to do it. Recruit friends to help hold yourself accountable.
Be honest and realistic with yourself about what can you manage to do just today or for the next week. This is creating a system and set of processes in your life that you can build on to get you to where you want to be.
Habit is what keeps you going. Start creating healthy habits and you will be pleasantly surprised at where you will end up.